summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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