Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
