sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
