would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
