Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Randomize
