Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize