so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
