drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Randomize
