It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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