you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
