But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
