I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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