You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
