Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize