No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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