I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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