I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Randomize
