I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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