So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
They took my balls.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
