its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
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