Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
you would pick up someone in the library
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Randomize
