I'm drive I can fine osifer
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
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