ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Randomize