Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
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