Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
