Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
