He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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