Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
