I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize