Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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