Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need moral support for this bender
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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