Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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