This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
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I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
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Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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