Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
