He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
