YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
