I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
