Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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