Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
