I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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