I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Randomize
