This girl is more easily done than said...
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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