Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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