Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
