So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize