white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
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There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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