But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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