I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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