am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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