Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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